"I almost gave myself a horny aneurysm..." ~The Tesla

"Damn dude. I didn't know contact highs were digital." ~The Tesla

"It's like a seven layer bean dip, but one of the layers is just burnt pubes." ~The Tesla

"Ahhh~ Pazuzu! Blow me an orgasm" ~The Tesla

"Ouroboros de Cocina. Wait... La Cocina de Ouroboros." ~The Tesla

"Those Peaches made me Cream" ~The Tesla

"You ever get so angry while washing dishes that you throw a wet sponge against the wall? That sound." ~The Tesla

"I've really been reaching into my bag of 'I just... wanna fondle my balls'" ~The Tesla

"I realized today that I'm more 'Pen' and less 'Is'." ~The Tesla

"And lo eth they doth call me the 'Curator of Alarmingly Long Mike 'n Ikes'." ~The Tesla

"It's the New Yorker. They're high falutin buttholes." ~The Tesla

"I was wearing my chest plate the other day and realized not only do *I* come equipped with nipples, so does my chest plate!" ~The Tesla

"This is the kind of song you'd slap your meat to, with *authority*." ~The Tesla

"Get out of my mouth, Mario!" ~The Tesla

"My juicy bits are excreting" ~The Tesla

"Tesla ain't knowin' shit about what shit is!" ~The Tesla

"Is Fishbone the Lhasa Apso cousin of Wishbone?" ~The Tesla

"I'm no one special. I put my boobs on one arm at a time, just like every other woman." ~The Tesla

"Fuck, I'm high." ~The Tesla

"Thank you for the gold, I shall palpate my moist areas with it." ~The Tesla

"Taloon is a war profiteer and I'm not okay with it!" ~The Tesla

"McDonald's Fries are the Fruit Stripe Gum of French Fries." ~The Tesla

"I need to get more Thicc backgrounds." ~The Tesla

"... what the hell is a Thicc background?" ~The Tesla

"I used to do this one handed! How did I not have Popeye forearms?!' ~The Tesla