Welcome to the "Shit The Tesla Says" thread! This is where we archive odd bits of wisdom said by our own TheTesla. Drunk or Sober, it'll be interesting!

"When I say I want to fuck The Beatles, let me clarify. I don't want to fornicate with an insect beetle, like a stag beetle, I mean I want to fuck Ringo Starr." ~The Tesla

"Don't get me wrong. Actually, get me wrong: Fuck you guys." ~The Tesla

"I'M THE POTATO!!" ~The Tesla

Piranha Plants. They go "Chomp. Chomp. Chomp." and "*Baby!*" ~The Tesla

"Ghost Town stream. That'd probably be the most mellow stream we've ever done... unless we all got into it, like 'Oh! I found the town! NO, you're at the wrong intersection. YOUR MOM'S THE WRONG INTERSECTION!" ~The Tesla

"Is there a song list? Yes. *hits "peebs" button* It's called Peebs. Er.. !songlist" ~The Tesla

"Alabama is known for it's big, snowy mountains. Right?"

"Sorry, I wasn't trying to be an asshole; I was trying to belch in the middle of that."

"Take care of your kids, teeth" ~The Tesla

"Trim off the fat, like I trimed off my dick. Oooooh!" ~The Tesla

"If it's called a 'pie hole', then how can you eat a sandwich with it?" ~The Tesla

*cracks a can of V8, sips* "Mmm... it's warm, savory, and I'm pretty sure it has mold in it." ~The Tesla

"Oh... I drizzled tuna juice all over myself, didn't I?" ~ The Tesla

"My ear holes enjoy being fornicated by their sound." - The Tesla

"Oooh. Time for some good bondage." ~The Tesla

"Did somebody just follow us while I was tucking?" - The Tesla

"If I can't use the phrase 'Your nipples are yawning', then consider me *uninterested*" ~The Tesla

"Apparently I wipe vigorously." ~The Tesla

"I'm gonna go balls deep on this mic." ~The Tesla

"Literally no shame, I can tell you the person that should feel ashamed is the one that's trying to like, tongue-fuck a sock. And that's me. I don't feel shame about that, neither should you." ~The Tesla

"Burnt Fucking" ~The Tesla

"Especially with how bad my teeth are, I can't just scrape the fucking corn off that. I've gotta shove that whole disc in my mouth and fucking tonguefuck it." ~The Tesla

"Gosh, look at those nipples!!!" -The Tesla

"I will eat somebody's face." -The Tesla