"Oh! It's a Flazzard! What the crap is a Flazzard?" ~The Tesla

"So... You're saying that the 'shit-the-tesla-says' quotes are my money shots?!" ~The Tesla

"That boss up in the tower is going to crush me... Normally you have to pay good money for that but jeez louise!" ~The Tesla

"I didn't want to be right! I was just trying to lower expectations for myself... I didn't want to be right!" ~The Tesla

"...Why am I *typing* this?!" ~The Tesla

"*IT'S THE CHLOROPHYLL!!!!*" ~The Tesla

"My rooms gonna smell like an orgasm. I'm so happy." ~The Tesla

"I'mma get a tattoo on my penis that says 'Pixel Perfect'." ~The Tesla

"Have you ever baloney boated your Reese's peanut butter?" ~The Tesla

"We gotta revive 'Burger Queen' and make their main sandwich the 'She Bopper'." ~The Tesla

"Holy *shit* I about touch of brown'd my pants laughing at that mental image" ~The Tesla

"I sneezed into a gallon of milk and now I have a gallon of cheese" ~The Tesla

"Oh shut up you Gonzo-nose-dicked bastard!" ~The Tesla

"You know this is a really fuckable rhythm?" ~The Tesla

"Y'all saw it earlier: A tiger ate Hanzo's face. So yeah, I'm a little on edge" ~The Tesla

"I like a little green in my French toast" ~The Tesla

"I'm not used to hearing my boobs sloshing." ~The Tesla

"I look like a Europop Girl mixed with a Hot Topic!" ~The Tesla

"Would 'Would?'. 'Would?' would!" ~The Tesla